Do you ever just stare at your reflection. I want to know who I am, that I was placed on this earth for a reason. I want to wake up every morning with a drive, a determination to be more then what society perceives me as : a fucked up kid with problems. In the mirror I search for answers, for who I am and what I am meant to be. Letting my looks define me seems to be the easy route in life, but happiness comes from the soul. Being true to who you are and maintaining a constant positive mentality is what we are told to do. Don’t hide from yourself, blah blah blah! Arnt you fucking bored, I’m sick of hearing the same shit from different frigid memories of authority.
My life hasn’t been easy, there is no doubt. My parents seperated when I was 6, I never understood why. two months ago I realise my mother had a ongoing cycle of betrayal with a disgusting man I am forced to call my step father. Being verbally and sometimes physically abused by girls who I once called my best friends, has really changed me as a person. That was at my old old school, a elite all girls boarding school. Then I was taken to a new school, these where some of the happiest days of my life. And it was the first time I was placed in an environent with boys! I made so many unforgettable friends and memories, only one day when I was sitting on the gold course with my best friends. I woman I didn’t reconise grabbed my arm and told me I had to go. She brought me back to my boarding house and watched while I packed up my belongings, then I was physically locked in small room in the medical centre overnight until my driver came to collect me the next morning. That was by far the worst day of my life, I screamed and cried as I watched the life I had built for myself shatter into a million shards of glass with deep deadly cuts piercing into my soul. All I was left with was my reflection, in my broken broken mirror.
Have to go now I will tell u more later thanks for reading xxx